"Could all that is lost ever be found? Could a garden come up from this ground at all?"
As I sat in worship singing these words by Gungor, my heart immediately went to the broken families that I am surrounded by in this community. Addiction and abuse are such strongholds in this place. Brokenness permeates homes and families.
I have heard countless stories of atrocities committed within families and relationships. I have
held women in my arms as they sob and recount stories of childhood rape. I have stood beside numerous women as they tell me, without the slightest emotion, how their boyfriend or husband becomes violent when he is drunk. I have listened to stories of nightly beatings, a woman being burned across her chest when her boyfriend threw hot soup at her, a young girl who slept every night for 17 years in a potato sack under her mom's bed to avoid being raped in her house, or a young pregnant teenager whose boyfriend nearly threw her through the plastic wall of their home. Domestic violence and abuse run rampant in this nation and particularly in this community.
A couple nights ago, I was walking down the street with Rosita and Gato going to visit their family. I pass by a neighbor's home where the grandmother is running towards her daughter's house screaming at the top of her lungs, machete in hand. She runs into the little tin hut, scoops up her granddaughter in her free arm, and begins shouting at her daughter's boyfriend that he will NOT lay a hand on her daughter or granddaughter. She holds the machete in her hand letting him know that if he comes near any of them, she will call the police. Rosita whispers to me, "Gema's boyfriend is drunk again. This happens a lot, but Martina doesn't let anyone mess with her family."
My gaze drifts across the street and I see another drunken father lying in the hammock in his yard. He has a 1/2 empty bottle of liquor in one hand, a machete across his chest, and his infant daughter in the other arm. He is yelling at the other men passing by, stirring up trouble. I just wondered how long it would be before his rants brought fighting and violence into his home.
A little farther down the street another drunken man was shouting at people in the streets, throwing things at them, trying to start a fight. His 5 year old daughter runs over and grabs his hand. She follows alongside him as he walks around the house, runs out into the street ranting, and returns home. You can see on her young face that feels a responsibility to protect her dad, to keep him safe. A burden that a child should never have to endure. My heart breaks to see the reality of life for these beautiful women and children.
It seems that this night in particular there are groups of drunken men on every corner. It took me a few minutes to realize the reason: today was the last payday for those working in
the sugar cane fields. They received a pocketful of money and will now be without work for the next 6 months until the planting and harvest season begins again.
There are so many factors that contribute the the brokenness in this community. The depth and prevalence of it seem impossible to overcome at times. There are moments, like the other night, when my heart wonders if it's even possible to see the restoration of family here in Candelaria. I sat singing,
"Can all that is lost ever be found? Could a garden come up from this ground at all?" wondering the same thing in my heart. My heart, my dream in the Kingdom, my desire for ministry center around the restoration of family. I sat asking the Lord,
"Is it even possible? Here in this place so full of brokenness, addiction, and abuse." And then come the very next words in the song...
"You make beautiful things
You make beautiful things out of the dust
You make beautiful things
You make beautiful things out of us
All around
Hope is springing up from this old ground
Out of chaos life is being found in You"
And my heart filled with HOPE. Yes, restoration is possible because my God is a God of renewal and restoration. Change doesn't happen over night, but it can happen. I see it in the eyes of some of my youth; a real hunger for something better and a willingness to wait for it. As some of them fall completely in love with Jesus they are choosing new life. Some of them will wait for spouses who love the Lord and who love and respect them. Some of them will love their children better than they have been loved. Some of them long for transformation and are willing to work for it.
As my heart filled with this newfound hope, my spirit cried out,
"This is something I'm willing to give my life to!" Linda shared a prophetic word with me a few months ago. Part of it was:
"Against that lie, against the bigness of the wound that the enemy left on a people group, I speak the name of El Shaddai [God who is all-sufficient] as a blessing over you, the child who was designed by God and raised up for this task...the calling of God on your life is deeply rooted in the name of El Shaddai. Almighty God triumphantly pits the all-sufficiency of His name against the petty wound that the enemy has magnified and amplified. He is all-sufficient for the wound, for the culture, and for the community that you have been called to, and for you, blessed child of El Shaddai."
I don't know exactly what this will mean for my life and my future. I don't know the steps to take to see this redemption come forth, but I know that it's the heart of my God. And it's something that He has planted so deeply in my heart as well. Restoration is coming and, in the Lord's grace, He is going to allow me to be a part of it. Let's see where this El Shaddai adventure leads!
